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30 Signs You're a Booty Call

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I'm not a professional, but my friends call me the advice queen for a reason.

Does he like you? Or are you just a booty call?

Does he like you? Or are you just a booty call?

Does He Really Like Me or Am I Just His Booty Call?

If you've ever asked yourself this question, you already know. But you may want to read on just to be sure.

In some situations, it's easy to get confused about what's going on between you and a potential beau. A guy may just be taking things slowly, like a cautious young man. Other guys may just be casual—nothing serious there, mate! Or, others may consider themselves players—you may have been classed as the dreaded booty call, and you don't even know it yet.

If you're a bit of a female player or strictly casual yourself, then you won't mind at all. However, if you really like this guy and think it's going somewhere, A.K.A. relationship land, and your gut is telling you something's just not right, read on!

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Do any of the following apply to you?

Are you just a booty call?

Are you just a booty call?

  1. He has a girlfriend or other girl (one-off) on the side.
  2. You have serious suspicions he's sexting someone else.
  3. Your friends and his can easily prove your suspicions.
  4. Almost every time you meet up is planned or initiated by him and are almost always on his terms and turf.
  5. Rendezvous always lead to sex.
  6. All you two do together is "get it in."
  7. Meeting in public is often a no-no unless it's for dinner or drinks when he finds it absolutely necessary. Points four and five, listed above, are especially pertinent here.
  8. Every time you meet, he never called to make plans in advance. He always calls and meets on the same day—at most, he will phone the day before.
  9. If, and that's a big, strong "if," he phones in advance, like a week earlier, the first thing he says is, "I'm free next [insert day, time, and place here]."
  10. You have been meeting for a considerable length of time with no growth in the relationship (if you can even call it that).
  11. He only calls you to initiate meeting up or sex. All other communication is done via text, Facebook chat, or IM, and all he says is mundane crap and silly things. In retrospect, you realize it never amounts to an actual conversation.
  12. His friends giggle as quietly as possible when in your presence.
  13. There are no emotional discussions concerning the two of you.
  14. There are no emotional discussions, period!
  15. He has the task of taking off your clothes down to the second—you'd be butt-naked before Usain Bolt finishes a 100-meter.
  16. There's no falling asleep after sex. If it's over, he gets you to leave, or if it's at your place, he does.
  17. Unless the sex is good. Then you can stay over for a morning sesh—followed by one of you leaving.
  18. Cuddles and lovey-doveyness never happen before or after sex. If it does, he's keeping you buttered up, so he can have your services for longer.
  19. He says, "Thank you," after sex, possibly followed by, "Have a nice day/rest of night."
  20. Hookups are only when he feels like it, not you (it isn't really about you). They happen when he is free and doesn't have another girl over.
  21. Whenever you make a request, he is busy.
  22. He doesn't care about the new underwear you sadly bought for him but appreciates your level of hygiene and pubic hair maintenance.
  23. Your friends roll their eyes as soon as you name drop him.
  24. You've seen him out having dinner with someone else.
  25. He loves doing it doggy-style—eye contact and any contact other than sexual doesn't interest him. (I am aware there would be other positions going on, but a noticeable preference for this one is a red flag.)
  26. You are always almost drunk, buzzed, or tipsy whenever you have sex.
  27. He is never all up in your George Foreman when you want him to be (yep, there's a bit of slang for you).
  28. He hates it when you squeal over babies or cute things—he acts as though talking of such things is rude. If you speak, he prefers it to be dirty!
  29. When he asks about your day, he hopes it was bad, so you can let out some pent-up steam on him.
  30. You can see many of the signs above in your current situation but are still in full-blown denial.

Bear in mind it takes more than one of these signs to confirm booty-call status. If you can only tick one, fear not! You may be more than a tap-in, tap-out.

However, if it turns out you are, and you don't want to be, woman up—get rid of him or demand more. Unfortunately, you need to be realistic. More than likely will not work either. The fact that you are a booty call says it all—he won't give more.

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