I have studied relationship psychology. Moreover, I love to write about relationship matters.
Life partners are important for mental well-being. We all want a loyal, strong, and devoted partner. The person we choose greatly affects our lives: our peace of mind, our mental health, our happiness, and so much more. It is important to choose it wisely. Sometimes, as a spouse or partner, we are unaware that we are unintentionally harming each other. For a healthy relationship, it is important to take care of the things that affect our daily lives. We want to be happy, laugh, and make good memories. If a relationship is constantly upsetting, it becomes annoying.
In this article, I will share ten ways you upset your partners unintentionally:
- Differing opinions with your partner.
- Publicly criticizing partner.
- Prioritizing things other than your partner.
- Taking no notice of their presence.
- No pat on the back.
- Unhealthy Communication.
- Ignoring what they are saying.
- Lack of a smile on your face.
- Letting go of things.
- Praise for others.
1. Differing Opinions With Your Partner
Harmony is essential in a relationship. Understanding each other's thinking and then acting accordingly is a sign of maturity. But we cannot deny the fact that the thoughts and ideas of two people can be different from each other. And when they argue with each other, they forget the sanctity of the relationship. Disturbing consequences can be avoided if the situation is handled properly. Is it necessary for the husband and wife to declare war if they disagree? In such a situation, if they listen to each other and think with patience that every person has his own point of view, their relationship can be strengthened instead of falling apart. Agreeing to disagree brings peace and also increases understanding of one another. It encourages you to hear the other point of view.
2. Publicly Criticizing Partner
Criticizing and blaming can ruin relationships. Especially when it is done in front of other people. When you criticize or blame your spouse in public, it shows a lack of understanding and compatibility. So it is important to nip it in the bud to avoid future tensions. For example, if you tell your partner in front of everyone that you are overweight, you should reduce it. I don't think it's a good idea because it can hurt them. They will feel insecure. They may also think maybe their partner is not interested in them anymore.
3. Prioritizing Things Other Than Your Partner
Setting priorities is important in life. They motivate you to set a track for your life and help with making decisions. As a spouse, you have to arrange your daily affairs in such a way that they do not affect the relationship between you and your partner. If you give priority to other things instead of your spouse, your relationship will become cold. Many problems in relationships start because of carelessness.
4. Taking No Notice of Their Presence
A relationship doesn't need constant attention, but it does need regular attention. I believe that personal space is important in a relationship. But avoiding and shunning can make the situation worse. In fact, your partner expects you to take notice of things they do. They even try to seek your vigilance by doing things they don't usually do. So, the crisis begins when you avoid them. And many people don't deliberately do this to their partners. They are simply careless.
5. No Pat on The Back
Praise brings positive energy to relationships and increases the emotional bonding between partners. Let me explain it with an example: A husband leaves home for work. His wife thought of giving him a surprise. She prepared a special table for dinner, decorating it with candles and flowers. The doorbell rings, and she goes heartily to welcome her hubby. The door opens and her husband comes in. He takes a quick look at the table and walks away, saying, "I am feeling drained after a lot of work." I'll meet you after a nap. " This made her down for the count and eventually, she thought all she had done was in vain. Whatever the case, your partner needs praise and attention.
6. Unhealthy Communication
Just imagine you are waiting for your spouse to come in, and you really want to speak with him/her about something serious. Your spouse comes in without paying heed to your presence. You want to start a conversation but, in return, you don't get any response, and your spouse is busy with the cell phone. A committed couple can feel the pain of insensibility. If you are creating this kind of situation, then be ready for repetitive attacks of ripostes. Relationships can be badly damaged if one is left out in the cold.
7. Ignoring What They Are Saying
Everyone needs to go the extra mile to make their lives peaceful. When you don't listen to and understand your partner's thoughts and feelings properly, it hurts them a lot. Spouses frequently try to tell something. But the response from the other side is not meaningful. The situation is certainly infuriating and discouraging. Maybe they don't realize that not giving attention to their spouse's point of view can create a difficult situation for the future. Lack of attention also affects the love bond in relationships.
8. Lack of a Smile on Your Face
You can't imagine what a smile can do. A smile wins hearts and makes life more beautiful. It is said that a smile is a language of kindness. So to be kind and compassionate, you need to put a smile on your face. How will harmony develop in your relationship when your face is devoid of all emotions? Smiling means telling your partner they are important. Smiling is an easy way to tell them you are living a satisfying life.
9. Letting Go of Things
Letting things go is crucial in a relationship—especially when the situation is critical. Holding your tongue to avoid useless debates is a part of it. Sometimes, letting things go can create a tense environment, and you or your partner may feel uneasy and unsatisfied. Things that need an explanation or actions that are doubtful can cause distress if not handled properly. And only saying "let it go" can ruin the relationship. It also affects the mental health of two people who are committed. Letting go sometimes may indicate to the partner that they are not taken seriously. They feel insecure and skeptical.
10. Praise for Others
The charm of a strong relationship is that two people understand each other. Praise for others is not a bad thing. In fact, it indicates your purity and honesty. When you are not praising your spouse enough and honoring others most often in front of them, It can bring them into a state of anger and jealousy.
A good relationship is when two people know their ups and downs—perfection and weaknesses. They accept each other without hesitation and refuse to give up on each other. Love and care are the cornerstones of a healthy relationship. But not giving attention to the views of a spouse, avoiding difficult issues, being ineffective, and getting defensive are signs of unhealthy relationships. These factors can badly tarnish the beauty of relationships. Try to be a good partner and expect the same for yourself.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2022 EK Jadoon